Reaction Shot: My Next Life as a Villainess E08 (or, I WAS RIGHT ABOUT CATARINA'S TRUEST LOVE!)

[spindizzy]

• Catarina deciding that the only way to get her brain in gear is to give up on studying and work in her garden for a while is very pure. And of course Alan shows up there, because that is one of the event spawn points.


• I just realised that she's humming along with the background music. Which she could literally be doing because Fortune Lover would have had a soundtrack. Whaaaaaaaaaat.


• She is showing her friendship by giving people ugly vegetables that she put a lot of time into growing. I can't judge, I keep giving my friends very ugly woolcraft or very short fic.


• Catarina keeps forgetting that her friends don't know about her doom flags, bless her.


• ... Mary. Honey. Angel of my heart. Why are you using opera glasses to creep on Catarina from your room. Why have you been putting effort into stopping Alan and Catarina getting together when your true rival is Geordo. MARY STOP BEING OBSSESSIVE ABOUT THIS AND PLAYING IN THE COMEDY OBSESSED LESBIAN TROPE.


• I guess the plus side is that Mary has DEFINITELY come out of her shell now?


• ... Good lord, Catarina actually remembered to go back to her studying, and to try studying with people because she wasn't doing well on her own. I'm honestly impressed! That looks like she's trying!


• (Also Alan looking happy to be wandering off with a pumpkin entertains me.


• Episode title: I became engulfed by desire...
  Me: I can tell you right now that it's going to be Catarina's desire for sweets. I have seen this show and I understand what is happening.


• ... Why did they go to the Student Council office?!


• Mary is so happy to be able to study with Catarina! ... And bless Sirius for helping them while they're cluttering up his office.


• Aha, Sirius is NOT in fact immune to Catarina being sincere at him, he's just not immediately harem bait.


• Geordo, who was blatantly going the wrong way to get to the East Wing library: I was planning to go there myself!
  Mary:
  Geordo: ^_^ That's alright with you ^_^ isn't it Mary? ^_^


• Catarina does not spend any time alone with people and is incapable of going anywhere without collecting more of them. I love her. I also love that in this cut of people agreeing to go to the library, Nicol's answer is just blankly staring at her.


• The East Wing is a completely separate building. RICH PEOPLE, OH MY GOD.


• Mary and Geordo would be a very dangerous team, because they both have the same attitude about spending time with Catarina and same eye-twitch when other people show up to chaperone.


• Mary and Maria called dibs on Catarina!


• Catarina: Oh hey, I found an interactive item!
  Catarina: Oh no, I found an interactive item!


• Mary and Maria came back JUST IN TIME to see this shenaniganry. Good timing those girls, love your work!


• ... The book's title is in Ancient script. Which Catarina doesn't read. Which means she had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what she was looking at.


• (One day I will stop having an irrational twitch about people opening a book up straight to the middle instead of the contents or index in media. I know it's because it's easier to show a book open to the middle but COME ON, GIVE A GIRL A BREAK HERE.)


• "When one's desire is fulfilled, those captured may be saved." ... Well this is the premise of a sex pollen fic if ever I read one. ...It could be a/b/o or aliens made them do it, but it's PROBABLY a sex pollen fic.


• I'M SURE THERE WILL BE NO REPERCUSSIONS TO TRYING TO READ THE MAGIC BOOK THAT CAN SWALLOW PEOPLE.


• Oh hey, the book's animated on the inside! I have no idea if the text is supposed to be what's happening on the page and the picture is an illustration or what, but it looks cool! Especially because when you look at the scenes that are hapening IN THE BOOK, you can see the texture of the page in the colours! I am a sucker for that effect, it's always a good look. Like, look at the backgrounds! I can't tell if that's meant to be watercolour paper (possibly with marker pens?) but I love it.


• Catarina seems like she's having one of those weird dreams where you're very sure that you need to be doing something (like studying for an exam) and everyone else is trying to get you to do something completely unrelated like rewire an elevator or drive a car to a country that you can't get to by car. ... Not that I have those dreams a lot or anything.


• Geordo: Now that the wedding is over, you finally belong me alone.
  Catarina: OH, this is a WEDDING DRESS!
  I love her and her priorities and her completely missing what Geordo's actually saying because SHE CAN'T STAY IN HIS ROOM ALONE WITH HIM UNTIL TOMORROW MORNING, SHE HAS AN EXAM TO STUDY FOR.


• (Catarina has apparently never considered that Geordo is actually going to follow through on the engagement. Or that he might actually want to marry her. Or what being married to a prince might entail at ANY POINT, let alone the "teenage prince is horny for his fiancée" part.)


• Also I can't stop snickering at him trying to be suave at her (it's his fantasy! He can 100% catch Catarina while throwing a wine glass into the air and catching the contents if he wants to!) but also GEORDO READ THE ROOM. Like, is he aware that Catarina is there and acting independently?


• MARY STEPPING IN TO SAVE CATARINA FROM SEXUAL HARRASSMENT LIKE A GOOD FRIEND, EVEN IF SHE'S DOING IT BECAUSE SHE'S JEALOUS! And Maria just there behind her like "... I have no idea how to handle this."


• Oh hey, that's Catarina's room! She was sleeping on her homework again, wasn't she.


• ... Keith. Honey. You're not a playboy in this timeline, where is this Seduce The Innocent vibe coming from? Also as someone who leans on people a lot while trying to write: she can't take notes like that my dude.


• REAL TALK THOUGH STEALING CATARINA'S TREATS WOULD PROBABLY MOTIVATE THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUT OF HER, SHE'D JUST BE VERY SAD THE WHOLE WAY THROUGH.


• Mary: *continues to save the day through rabid jealousy*
  (... Also I know that she means she doesn't want anyone else hand-feeding Catarina, but she is aware that Maria feeds Catarina sweets all the time right? And that she would probably let anyone hand-feed her sweets with very little objection if the sweets were good enough?)


• Me: Keith just wants to feed her sweets! I approve!
  Me:
  Me:
  Me:
  Me: ... Oh shit, he was going to kiss her, wasn't he!
  LOOK, SOMETIMES THESE THINGS ARE AMBIGUOUS, OKAY.


• Maria, who isn't threatened by Catarina being crushed on by everyone she knows: Oh hey! I think I might have worked out the plot of this episode!


• Seriously this is the point where I started to get suspicious of Sirius, because HE SENT THEM TO THIS LIBRARY SPECIFICALLY. WAS IT A CO-INCIDENCE? OR WAS IT HIM GOING "HEY, LET'S GET THE PROTAGONISTS TO FIND A MAGIC BOOK!


• ... Oh shit what if Fortune Lover is like Hatoful Boyfriend and if you don't romance anyone at all [spoilers] show up in the middle of the night and [spoilers]?! CATARINA WHAT IF YOU OVERCORRECTED?!


• I want to have words with the library department of this school. You seriously didn't notice a mythic-tier magic book on your shelves during your weeding and stock management duties? Really?!


• (Am I spoiled by working in a science library, where we have few enough hardcopy books that staff do probably manage to touch every single book at least once a month? DAMN RIGHT. The arts library is a different story altogether.)


• THE BOOK PROLONGS ITS LIFE BY EATING PEOPLE, WHAT THE HELL. AND ONLY SEEMS TO DO THINGS WHEN THE BOOK IS OPEN, WHICH SEEMS LIKE A WEIRD STRATEGY FOR AN AMBUSH PREDATOR TO TAKE. I guess its usual strategy is "When they drop me I will hit the floor and stay open, thus getting to feed off them as they go through their desires, mwahahaha!" but that is still not a good strategy! ... Also Mary is 100% the sort of person who would launch a book across the room for betraying her like this, I don't think it should be taunting her this way.


• MARY KNOWS THAT LITERALLY EVERYONE IS IN LOVE WITH CATARINA. AND SHE'S DOING THE FULL GHIBLI HAIR-POOF-WHEN-SURPRISED THING WHILE MARIA IS TRYING TO STOP HER ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING DANGEROUS WITH THE MAGIC BOOK. ... Also I'm with Mary, I don't think letting the hormonal teenagers live out their ~desires~ to completion would be a good plan. I think you should hold out for Catarina because she is going to 100% not have any desires relating to people, only to sweets.


• Maria is there for Mary, waaaah! They're going to work together! And Mary has found hope!


• Sophia has a personal library and I'm very jealous. I too would like to live in Sophia's library! Although I'm unsurprised that Catarina saying that she wants to live in this library has got Sophia going "YES I AM PREPARED TO MOVE IN WITH YOU AT ANY TIME." (Not "into you" like I initially typed, holy fuck that was Freudian and a half.)


• SHE IS KABEDONING CATARINA DESPITE BEING A GOOD FOOT SHORTER THAN HER, EXCELLENT, YES, I LOVE THIS, WHAT A GOOD ROMANCE-OBSESSED SWEETHEART.


• Sophia is trying to do a proper romantic confession! And Catarina completely misunderstands the context that she's saying "I love you too in!" ... Also never ask a question like "Do you love me more than the trait that fandom is going to latch onto and never let go of?" because you won't like the answer! (... Does anyone else remember the "Daddy or chips" advert, on this topic?)


• SAVED FROM AWKWARDNESS BY MARY'S JEALOUSY!


• Wait. Is Nicol ALSO a fan of the Devilish Count series? Does he have Tuxedo Masks' power of being unrecognisable while wearing a domino mask? Like, I understand why "Getting to escape the ravening hordes that might tear me apart like I'm Orpheus," but also WHY IS HIS GRAND DESIRE TO HAVE MAGICAL THIEF SKILLS AND LEAP ACROSS THE CITY?!


• Damn, he's got a smile that can drop a crowd at twenty paces.


• Catarina is back to "Can we go back to school? I left my stuff in the library," because she is so good and so confused by everything happening here.


• Mary: I AM GOING TO BURN THIS BOOK.


• I'm going with Maria's explanation of what's happening, because I too am very confused that these are the fantasies that everyone is holding for Catarina. Except maybe for Sophia, because Sophia absolutely could kabedon Catarina and demand to be loved more than sweets, she just might not get the answer she was looking for. ... LISTEN, I JUST REFUSE TO BELIEVE THAT GEORDO WAS CAPABLE OF DAYDREAMING ABOUT HIS WEDDING NIGHT WITHOUT IMAGINARY KEITH SETTING AN ARMY OF IMAGINARY EARTH DOLLS ON HIM. BUT I WOULD 100% READ THAT FIC IF ANYONE'S GOT IT.


• Mary: *gives dramatic speech about facing down whatever desire the book is trying to show her*
  Book: So hear me out: Alan playing the piano while Catarina watches, possibly he does a dramatic hair-flick, maybe he glistens a little —
  Mary: *immediately closes the book*


• Mary's flat dead eyes are a very good indicator of how I feel when the Allos Are At It Again too much.


• I was with her on "The one it's hurting the most is Catarina!" because stumbling through people's fantasies when you have no idea what's going on and don't understand why your friends are putting their faces so close to yours sounds like a hellscape! But no, Catarina is clearly suffering because there are delicious sweets waiting for her in the real world and she isn't here to eat them.


• AND MARY FINALLY REALISES THAT CATARINA'S DESIRE IS PROBABLY THE ONE THAT THEY'LL BE ABLE TO FULFILL!


• Mary and Maria holding sweets and tea up to the book as though they can entice her out that way.


• Catarina eating an entire house is very on-brand, but turning her into a sweetie vacuum seems mean.


• Oh good, everyone is laid out neatly on the floor.


• AND THEY'RE BACK!


• Catarina being like "OH, it was a magic book! No wonder all those weird things kept happening!" is the most her. I love and support one (1) oblivious ball of sunshine. ... Okay, that was a lie, I support all of them.


• That moment where everyone looks at Catarina and goes "Wait, Tales of Desire...?" and IMMEDIATELY FLEES cracks me up.


• Alan: What happened inside that book? All I did was play the piano.
  Mary: And that's all you need to know, Prince Alan.


• Wait, did Catarina manage to save everyone because the book couldn't make her feel full with imaginary sweets? And completely ignore the explanation for what happened because she was too busy with her sweets and tea? Yep, sure, this checks out.


• Catarina running barefoot through the grass and Alan being very flustered by it brings me joy. And he does it too because she suggests it!


• Bless him grumping at her for climbing trees with no warning and then joining her in a tree because he can't not. And they get to be happy together about how pretty everything is! Waaaaaaaah! This is the exact sort of nonsense I want from my romances, okay, the way that they're maybe not specifically crushing on each other but are just happy and sharing things together! It's good and makes me happy, okay.


• Mary: NO, NO KISSING ALLOWED, I MUST STOP THEM REALISING THAT FEELINGS EXIST!