I'm watching one of the Madoka Magica spin-off movies

[spindizzy]

(The third one, I think? Rebellion?)

And it makes FUCK ALL SENSE. Like, for reals, I cannot work out what is going on and what the plot is supposed to be. Like it appears to involve lots of dancing, cake, and solving the problem of monsters by sitting round tables in a nightmare dimension singing about food.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS THING?!

ETA 11: Right I am putting this behind a cut. There are no real spoilers, but you can witness my slow mental breakdown over the course of this movie behind it.

ETA: Okay, so I've got to the part with the plot, but I'm still stuck on WHAT. WHAT. HOW. I CAN'T EVEN.

ETA 2: I don't know how anyone can watch this show at all and not assume that Homura is painfully, heartbreakingly, world-endingly in love with Madoka. I really don't. Ditto I don't know why you'd ever bother with the manga when it physically can't do all of the awesome art things that the anime does.

ETA 3: OH FUCK YOU KYUBEY FUCK YOU IN YOUR FUCKING FACE.

ETA 4: HOW DID YOU THINK THAT WAS A GOOD PLAN? DID YOU NOT PAY ATTENTION TO ANYTHING ABOUT HOMURA'S CHARACTER NOTES?! ANYTHING AT ALL?!

ETA 5: *SOBBING* oh my god no why why is this the plot why does Homura love Madoka so much everything is terrible forever

ETA 6: EVERYONE LOVES EVERYONE SO MUCH REGARDLESS OF THE WORLD AND PLOT AND TIMELINE AND HOMURA WHY CAN YOU NOT JUST TRUST PEOPLE OH GOD WHY IS EVERYTHING TERRIBLE AND HEARTBREAKING AND I LOVE EVERYONE WHY ARE YOU SO HEARTBREAKING AUGH *sobbing*

ETA 7: OH GOD THIS WAS NOT THE ENDING THAT I SIGNED UP FOR HOMURA THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WHAT IS YOUR LIFE AND WHY ARE DOING IT

ETA 8: NOOOOOOOO HOMURA STOP WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE EVERYTHING WOOOOOOOOOOOOORSE STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP YOU COULD HAVE BEEN HAPPYYYYYYYYYYY WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHY

ETA 9: Kyubey may be an expressionless doll, but I think that was genuine fear I saw in its eyes there.

ETA 10: NO THIS WAS NOT THE ENDING THAT I WANTED WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY EVERYTHING WAS SO CLOSE TO BEING HAPPY AND NOW IT'S ALL DESTROYED FOREVER. *SOBBING*

ETA 12: EVERYTHING IS RUINED AND THERE IS NO GOD WHOSE BRIGHT IDEA WAS THIS AND WHY DO THEY HATE JOY AND ALSO HOMURA AND MADOKA WHY IS HOMURA TRYING TO RUIN MADOKA'S LIFE HOMURA WHAT HAVE YOU BECOME

ETA 13: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ENDING WHAT

WHAT

WHAT

All I'm saying is "I never thought I'd say this but I NEED FIC THAT BREAKS UP MY SHIP BECAUSE CANON JUST RUINED EVERYTHING FOR EVER."